Peter is just another vanilla wuss, he's not a Dom.

Here is the email I discovered this morning when I got to work, from Peter...
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[SASSY GIRL],

I'm very glad that you and Pete were able to get the house you wanted. It's very good news and I wish you good luck.

Please do not continue to write to me. There is much in my life that I need to simplify, and this relationship has to be one of them.

Peter
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Hmmm. After re-reading this message a few times, I have reached the sad conclusion that Peter is much weaker and more pussified than I thought, when it comes to his claiming to be highly "evolved" and able to rise to the challenge of remaining my platonic friend, like he apparently could do with every OTHER submissive he's known, and like he promised me he would.

Ok, I've had this thought too...perhaps he loves me SO much, he feels this ending of our friendship is for the best. Maybe this is his way of showing me "tough love." But if that's the case, then why wouldn't he just be truthful about how he feels, "You're a pain in the ass," or "I'm glad somebody ELSE will be dealing with your high-maintenance agnst and meltdowns," or "GOD what a relief to be rid of you..." because it seems THAT would really be what they call TOUGH LOVE. I mean, I thought "tough love" meant that you say what you mean, and mean what you say? Why then would he choose to LIE TO ME by promising to be my friend? What did that solve exactly? All it did was cause me a considerable amount of pain to my heart, which continues to hurt even now.

Or, more likely, though I have tried to give him the benefit of the doubt and avoid this conclusion: maybe he's just a collosal pussified jerk who uses people and lies to everyone in his life, then goes cold like Dick Cheney whenever real deep emotion rears its ugly head. He doesn't know how to handle emotion. Even his WIFE accuses him of being closed and shut-off. The physical stuff, he's great at. Anything more than that, and he's a crybaby wuss jerk who apparently doesn't know himself at all.

Or maybe all he wanted was a hole to fill and I just happened to have a few. Maybe he never really cared for me at all and just looked at me like I was some kind of object he could use and abuse and walk away from when the feelings got too intense. Or maybe he's got some other subbie to occupy his time now, and needs to "simplify" his life by focusing on THAT affair instead. (like he did with the dozens of OTHER affairs he's had in the past 18 years of his loveless marriage).

He SHOULD just "simplify" his life by ridding himself of his stupid vanilla cold-fish wife who rejects that Domly side of him completely, but doesn't even try to make up for it with love or sex and just continues to complicate everything and cause him grief---or maybe, so this kind of hurtful situation doesn't happen to anyone else again, maybe he should "simplify" his life by never being a DOM to anyone again and just go home and be faithful to that cold-fish wife and loveless marriage---though if he's THIS weak with remaining my platonic friend, I doubt he could ever be strong enough to do that either. He sure hasn't been able to yet.

I really wanted to believe that he was stronger than this. Every sub wants her Dom to be strong, but I guess I was wrong about him. It was just an illusion. He's just another weak pussified vanilla man who can't rise above pettiness to evolve into a real Dom. Well okay, ever the dutiful subbie, I will do what I'm told and respect his need to "simplify his life," and I won't write to him anymore. He's still dominating me even now, but wow what a fucking pussy way of doing it. Talk about betraying a Dom/sub trust.

But that won't stop me from writing about him here on the blog. If he chooses to read it, that's his choice. I could even post all the 650+ emails that I still have from him on here if I so desired, showing just what a fraud and a liar he truly is. Nobody is forcing him to read any of it. I could even print those emails out and send a big package of them to his wife, if I so desired. Give her something to read on those sexless nights when she's all alone at home while he is out "working late."

Just like he's given ME no choice in this matter, I'll return the favor and say there's not a goddamned thing he can do about THAT idea of mine, either.

I've learned a LOT from Peter.

Oh, and one last thought. Maybe...just maybe...

He'll surely rue the day he ever met me.

---Sassy Girl